A federal judge in San Francisco decided today that gays and lesbians have a constitutional right to marry, striking down Proposition 8, the voter approved ballot measure that banned same-sex unions. LA TIMES

My first thought was “Was this too little too late?” I mean completely understand the reasoning behind people taking a stand and trying to make their community a safer and better place. In most neighborhoods within the southside of Chicago, the corner convienence store is anything but a convienence. It’s the local hang out for the pushers, dealers, hypes, crackheads, drunks and the homeless. But is it fair to say that the proprietors are the cause for the downfall on the urban neighborhood? What I get from this window posting is that without the corner store, there wouldn’t be any urban decay and I know that’s not right…

Google Link

Them: Hey, why haven’t you posted anything on 9-11.
Tony: I’m not good with things like that.
Them: What do you mean?
Them: You haven’t posted anything on attacks in the past
Them: don’t you think its time you should?
Tony: dude, slow up for minute.
Tony: I dont like to celebrate death. I don’t think its a health thing to do.
Tony: *healthy*
Them: How did you come to that conclusion?
Tony: If we focus to much on death, how can we live?
Them: So you don’t acknowledge the attacks?
Tony: Of course I do, thats not the point I was trying to make. I can’t begin to explain the feeling of numbness on that day. Shit I still feel that way now.
Them: so why haven’t you wrote about?
Tony: I’ve try, but I just can’t find the words

This past weekend was no exception, for I had invited my new friend to accompany me to my Frat brother’s book release/signing party. Over the sounds of some neo soul/ new-bohemian cd played we talked about various plans for this upcoming Sunday and he asked (paraphrasing of course) ‘What church do you go to?’ ‘I don’t’ I replied and from there I could have predicted the next words out his mouth. As a non-Christian, I’ve been in this scenerio plenty of times where it seems that I have to defend my faith as to why I don’t attend church. Oddly enough since I’ve live in Chicago the question frequently asked isn’t “What is you faith?” but “Where to you church?”

I guess I should stop with the misnomers in my post titles since this isn’t a post about ‘Relationships & Religion’ but rather ‘Relationships with Religion.’ As a child, religion wasn’t never pushed onto me, being that my mother was Muslim and my father was Born Again (don’t ask me how that happened). My dad didn’t want to step on anything that my mom was teach me but he wanted to make sure that I did get a Christmas. And as I grew older my mom became less strict on following the Islamic faith and bought me gold chains and feed me bacon. I never really felt tied to either extreme and in the end my parents told that I should follow my own path and see what faith speaks to me.

So from that point, I’ve never felt the need to justify or defend what I chose to believe in… I do believe in God and I put my faith in Him. I accept that we may not agree on the same beliefs, but I’ve learned that tolerance can go a long way.

This past weekend, one of my fraternity brothers came into town for a relative’s graduation. I spent a lot of time trying to get my other brothers to spend with him so I wouldn’t. Even though I find my brother to be annoying, he is still my frat and he deserved better. While I did take him out to dinner, I was rather short with him for most of the night and when he wanted to go to the Generator, I cutted the night short and went home. I Am not My Brother’s Keeper. That same night I had a talk with Drrrl about Chicago Gay Pride since it was this past weekend but more in particular previsous Windy City Black Prides and the obvisious shade being thrown by the attendees. Why is that overall purpose of WCBP (building community) is overshadowing by stank attitudes? Needless to say, the Delta Chapter of Kappa Psi Kappa Fraternity Inc. will be in attendance and either volunteering or have some type of booth at WCBP this summer.

Something else I realized this past week was the lost of several people close to me. Whether by passing or moving, I can no longer spend the time I would with them. Several folks have reveal their intentions of moving away from Chicago and I felt so devastated by it. I’m so use to having them around and when you care for people that much, when they leave it hurts because I know that things will never be the same. But I ‘m dwelling on the negativies. Instead of seeing it as an oppurtunity for my friends to better themselves or to seek a better path in life, I focus on the downside that pertain to me. EJ told that I’m allowed to be selfish with my friends, but it still doesn’t make it right.

On a positive note, I did run into several associates who I haven’t seen in awhile at Pride this year. I also got to see my little brother Tracy aka Gotti aka Tracy Escada walk runway.

At first not having PhillyBred.com recognized anywhere use to eat away at me, now it doesn’t bother me, and in fact I’m embracing it. So fuck a 9rules.com, fuck a Six24.com, and fuck a webring.

There are some things in life that I’m afraid of; spiders, being homeless, my dentist but not HIV/AIDS. Some time after my mom found out about my preferences, we had a lengthy discussion about grandchildren, health issues and my safety. She told that she was afraid for me, afraid to have to bury her only child. That was the one thing you would never be able to handle and made me promise to be smart about the choices I make in life. That was six years ago and I still uphold that promise and get tested every six months (every April and October). For me, the best way to stay safe is to be educated and that’s why I’m not afraid of HIV and AIDS. Not if I can only do the same thing about spiders.